Purgatory M School

IMG_9859 IMG_9861 IMG_9864

School days.. the first day.. always exciting and

nerve wracking.. all senses.. emotions..

intellect focused for what

WILL

COME!

and grades 1 through 5.. not bad except

for that second year.. at Private Catholic School..

so advanced from my small town school.. in a two

story building.. walking distance from a river home..

and then across town.. small class rooms.. same teacher

all day long.. same kids all day long .. same friends to get to know..

and oh.. always at the top of the class.. only challenge NOT

to make anything less

than

A

A

A

Straight ACING

ALL STUFF SCHOOL..

hmm.. 11 years old comes

6th grade

a beast yet

unknown..

Halls of School Brightly Lit..

homeroom by 8 AM..

but many rooms

to come

with

different classes and different teachers

but still school as EASY AND FUN..

competing against friend Jill

who is the only

one who

can

top

me in

grades

before then..

so i smile brightly just waiting

for the games to begin.. but wait..

a new word comes i have not heard before..

an F word and not Fred by some bully boys

who tell me what the hell are you doing F word..

wipe that smile off your face mister we do not

allow boys to smile here.. don’t even think

about it.. but wait.. i’m not thinking

about it.. I’m just feeling it

but anyway.. don’t

know what

that

F word means.. just that those

boys got some kinda problem

for sure.. anyway class starts

and Amanda taps me on the shoulder

and says you know you have a FUNNY

SHAPED HEAD.. I’VE NEVER SEEN

ONE LIKE THAT..

hmm.. i’m

thinking a head’s

a head.. for thinking..

and dam i can’t see the back

of my head to know

what you

are talking

about..

but i’m too busy paying attention

to Ms. Bonner to become the

teacher’s pet as i can charm

any teacher into

believing

i

am the best

student ever if I just

look into her eyes and

never ever break contact..

’cause

it’s just

naturally

how i

connect

to others in

SPOCK MIND

MELD where student

becomes one with TEACHER

 like

KUNG

FU

MY

FAVORITE

TV SHOW..

ALONG WITH

THE WILD WILD WEST..

oh and then it’s time for P.E.

and i get to sport my new school

sports shorts.. and Tammy says..

HaHA! Fred has bird legs..

and i look at my

legs and think

about wings..

and flying..

BACK from PE into math class

and there is all around sports fanatic

Murry who will one day become

Mr. High School.. Mr. Football..

Coach of the Football Team

and Athletic Director

at the

top

of

his game..

he turns around and says

peabody.. peabody.. peabody..

peabody.. ever so often..

and i’m thinking

hmm..

what

is

a PEA

BODY

Anyway..

Lynn on the other

side chimes in with

skank.. skanky.. skank..

and i’m thinking sounds

like skunk.. skunk..

skunk..

and i think i smell fine..

but she sure doesn’t look

like she likes me much..

this is getting challenging

and i’m starting to feel

like something

must be

very wrong

for

me to get all this less than

‘A’ Feedback from what at

this point seems like

the whole dam

school..

ah.. finally an escape..

the school bus comes..

i can finally relax but

WAIT!.. VICKY

in the

back of the bus..

turns around

to her friends and says look

look look aren’t his eye lashes

pretty they look just like a girls’

eyelashes.. and oh yeah back in

home room earlier some boy says

Hi Mr. Wanda McKenzie

you look just

like her..

and yes.. Wanda  smiles

a lot and has semi-short

blonde hair and spectacles

and her daddy owns a

car dealership but

OH MY

GOD

if Vicky thinks i’ve

got long eyelashes that

must mean that boy

thinks I’m a girl

OH

GOD

GET

ME

HOME

QUICK

OFF

this bus.. my Dachshund

Charlie never judges me..

he will let me hug him

and roll around

at my feet

as always and never ever

call me the F word.. Skunk..

Peabody.. Long Eye Lash Girl..

Wanda.. Bird Legs..

and just let

me Love

him

free with smiles..

and that works out okay the

rest of the year.. but Charlie

finds a way to get outside

the gate and one

day my

only

real friend

outside of family

is laying on the side

of the road..

and i am

too

heartbroken to

even get near to

say goodbye..

and the whole family

cries.. and i never get another

dog and decide if i become my best

friend no one will ever hurt

me or

leave

me again..

except

me…

777

8182015

25

7

723

12

3

http://freeversenudepoetry.blogspot.com/2015/08/culture-clothing-sins-free-verse-nude.html

About katiemiafrederick

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30 Responses to Purgatory M School

  1. http://dversepoets.com/2015/08/18/poetics-back-to-school/#comment-99221

    ^^^

    Thanks Gabriella..

    i needed this prompt..

    smiles..:)

    And

    tears….

  2. X says:

    SUcks. All the judgement. The bullying. The tearing down.
    I feel you man. I went through similar through middle and early high school before
    I hit my growth spurt and caught up with the others. Sorry you had to go through it
    though it plays into who we become on some level.

    • Ah.. yes.. my friend.. X.. as note above on the starting photo.. where My teacher Mrs. B for Bonner states on the earlier part of the school year.. the ‘Old Fred’.. and per the song by Jessie J.. above.. i go out and buy some weights.. and start health habits that last me the rest of my life.. and eventually in high school.. Gracie.. another one of my not so well wishers from middle school.. comes up to me and tells me Fred.. you’ve really improved.. we are proud of you.. welcome to the human race.. in those words more or less..

      And although my wish to have a real girlfriend from Kindergarten never materializes until after high school.. i do not stop being nice with smiles.. and develop many close friendships.. and even one of the high school bullies who announces me at the beginning of the Beta Club meeting.. who is then President of this club for nerds.. Welcome Ladies and Gentleman and Fred..and he later confides that you know what.. i can’t understand it.. you are everyone’s favorite person.. and yes.. he is talking about another Lynn.. who is my new best friend… who he has a crush on.. and she gives me her time as friend.. eating lunch with me everyday.. and trivia note.. we both tie at 11 out of 381 at the end of the high-school days..

      And I always wish then that Lynn will be my girlfriend.. but First Baptist Girls only date First Baptist Boys.. and by then.. i am not part of any church at all.. except for the one out in nature.. but she calls me her best friend Fred and that is enough for me then.. as i don’t even know what sex is until sixteen years old.. and i don’t miss much.. as i Learn to Love girls for their personalities instead of T and A’s.. and the missing continent i know nothing at all about until after high school.. as Penthouse.. only gives an exterior view of that new horizon of feeling stuff in life…

      Anyway.. during the period of my pain disorder.. i lose a lot of my long term memory.. with the emotions that leave me then.. and truly this entire blog has been therapy for me to regain my memories and humanity… as i don’t think many people can possibly understand what it’s like to not even be able to remember if you ever smiled or belly laughed before.. as when emotions go.. there is no reference at all to any emotions as feelings are the reference point.. and not empty shells of words alone…

      I spend today at an ophthalmologist office.. with those drops that dilate your eyes.. and a lot of time.. thinking about the old days.. after i see this prompt.. and those feelings of sadness come back but more than anything the joy of even being able to feel sadness.. as that is what makes us appreciate Love as much as i do now.. for sure.. and truly without emotions it is hard to feel GOD too.. so i AM BLESSED BEYOND BELIEF.. and i always hope my words or dance of life.. will help someone know and feel it is okay to be different.. enjoy life as silly.. and be strong and courageous too…

      I have lots of inspiration.. and I see my ‘old friend’ Murry again.. as he nears retirement as Athletic Director at the High School.. I have the joy of him meeting my still young looking wife in 25 years of marriage and reporting to him that yeah.. i become a Federal Military Installation Athletic Director and retire 5 or so years ago.. then.. when i see him.. and i tell him i just Write and Dance now.. for fun.. while my wife shops.. looking down at him from around 4 inches above.. 50 LBS or so plus in muscle.. and a bright white smile.. that defies his somewhat ‘older teeth’.. belly extending a little more.. and snow white hairs with the miles of life driven hard to get the biggest house on the block…

      I have the biggest heArt..

      That’s all that counts..

      NOW

      and

      THEN..

      SMiles..

      and Lesson
      for Infinity NOW
      in my smAll view
      of ALLTHATIS
      AKA
      GOD..:)

  3. Yes. This is how it so often is, and should not be. We need Kindness programs in every school. Absolutely devastating that your dog died. I am sorry – and glad you wrote it . You wrote it real.

    • Yes.. Sherry.. ONE
      thing LIFE Teaches
      me WELL IS to Live IT
      REAL and FULL..
      and never ever
      be afraid to
      share it
      100%
      Real
      as Truth and
      Light and Dark..
      and yeah.. modern science
      even shows that humans are in
      real empathy trouble as empirical
      measures of college age adults
      in ways of empathy are
      decreasing at around
      30 percent in the
      last several
      decades..
      The Zombie Apocalypse
      is a meme for reality
      as humans
      lose their
      heArts
      soUls
      and spiRits..
      and Truly the Internet
      is a thriving place for Zombies
      clear to see.. particularly on YouTube
      as people have contests to see how
      much of a Zombie in cruelness
      to other humans they
      can be.. the
      best revenge
      IS LOVE
      LIVING
      WELL IN
      FLESH AND BLOOD..
      BUT SADLY MANY FOLKS
      WHO ARE BULLIED BECOME
      THE BIGGEST BULLIES TOO..
      UNCONDITIONAL LOVE
      IS MUCH MORE FUN..
      WITH BIG SMILES
      AS JOY..:)

  4. Gabriella says:

    No child should have to go through that kind of bullying, ever. I think schools take this issue much more seriously than they used to when I grew up. Therefore it is important we educate the potential bullies as well as the potential victims so they are not afraid of speaking. But, maybe more importantly, we should educate the silent majority, those who see and do not speak out, those who are the audience the bullies need to thrive.

    • Hi Gabriella.. I sure hope schools take it more serious but at least where i live.. i know the children do not.. overall.. and with the Internet there are more ways to bully young folks than ever before.. and the only way to stop that i think.. is if the children are taught to Tolerate.. and Accept differences among their peers.. and Love better and stand together against bullies when no adults are looking.. i do see that now on the Internet more often.. particularly on the gay issue that has always been the last pariah.. of the lesser seen by others.. overall.. in the United States culture.. it is always inspiring to me.. when I see folks stand up for others.. and acknowledge and honor their full humanity no matter how different from the Vanilla norm.. they may be.. smiles..:)

  5. hailee's comma says:

    This is fantastic, Fred. And so brave and honest of you to share. Thank you for writing this!

    “but wait..
    a new word comes i have not heard before..
    an F word and not Fred” … I had a similar experience too, but more in the form of a prank than being called a derogatory name.

    “i can charm
    any teacher into
    believing
    i
    am the best
    student ever if I just
    look into her eyes and
    never ever break contact” … This is so interesting, considering the Asperger’s; eye contact is usually difficult, and yet, it was natural for you.

    “and decide if i become my best
    friend no one will ever hurt
    me or
    leave
    me again..
    except
    me…”

    So right on.

    Awesome poem.

    • Ah.. thanks so much hailee’s comma for stopping by and providing those kind words of appreciation for what i do here today.. and yes.. intense non-stop focus staring directly into another person’s eyes when speaking with them.. is considered inappropriate and potentially.. intimidating by standard norm of human cultural rules.. and technically also a clinical symptom in some forms of Asperger’s/Autism along with extreme empathy for some and little for others.. however for me.. i Love people and am simply absorbing all of their soul as part of me through the windows of what they are deepest inside.. and i guess since i wear shades now.. it is not nearly as disarming.. as before.. some folks say please don’t look so deep.. i feel like you are undressing my soul.. and sure i am.. and hoping for something both light and fascinating.. but yes.. i can see the darkness of souls too.. as there is much more than meets the eye alone.. in eye to eye contact.. for within.. is the history of infinity of each unique soul.. just waiting for me to see.. given the opportunity of course.. and i will love it if more folks show their eyes on the Internet as truly i want to see that greatest expression of soul that comes through windows of us.. when within looks outside.. with us watching.. just patiently watching.. to absorb it all.. as all watchers can and will do.. smiles..:)

  6. hailee's comma says:

    Oh, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that Jessie J song. SOOOOO much.

    • Yes.. hailee’s comma.. Oh my Jessie… i am singing and dancing off the same sheet of music from her too.. as she just wants the world to dance.. as nicely illustrated below.. and it ain’t about the ba bling ba bling.. smiles.. coconut man.. moon head.. and P..;)

  7. kanzensakura says:

    I hated school. I saw kids being bullied and back then, it didn’t matter. I am glad schools are more on this than they were. I was never bullied. I kept to myself and ignored most of the other kids, except one time I punched an older boy in the nuts when he kept pulling my hair. and when he bent down, gave him a good upper cut in the face, just like my grandfather taught me. he taught me to box because I was a small child and my mother told me not to take crap. So, no more bullying. But it was just another reason to hate school. It’s a wonder some of us survived without being totally crazy.

    • Hi Kanzensakura.. after this experience i am fortunate and sprout up to almost my entire height in middle school.. albeit still at around 120 LBS.. but still.. for some reason no one has ever attempted to actually physically abuse me in life.. and now that i can fight back with ease.. anyway.. i am still happy not to have to.. the best offense can be a greatest defense.. and with a martial arts exhibition here and there.. in public.. words and actions get around.. smiles.. and when anyone bumps into me in the bar.. they quickly say my bad man.. excuse me..

      i believe in being able to defend oneself and not having to ever have to use those skills to actually hurt someone.. IF possible.. as those skills become more proficient with practice.. and yeah.. 930LBS of kicking power 1 inch from any target i choose in exhibition illustrates that nicely.. in 360 degrees of movement.. smiles..

      But most importantly.. the actual practice of it provides mind and body balance in emotional regulation and sensory integration.. better cognitive executive functioning in focus and short term working memory.. all clinical symptoms of Autism.. and essentially the real life working cure for me.. that allows me comfort in my own skin..

      And to make a stranger of a friend.. from the roughest looking bar dudes.. to the fairest of them ‘all’ in dance.. smiles again.. i wanna connect with everyone.. and fearless pays that due.. in real flesh and blood life too..

      And yeah.. overall.. school is insane in many ways.. as it teaches us to be cogs in an efficient working machine for the materialism excesses of culture.. and rarely to even be human again..

      And this is my favorite song for that reality.. as i too become the logical one.. the clinical one.. then.. as culture decides.. i will then.. but nah.. i follow the True Wild and Free ONE NOW.. THE GOD OF no limitations or expectations as FREE.. knowing and most importantly FEELING SaMe..:)

  8. lynn__ says:

    I’m sorry you were bullied, Fred, and so sad you lost your friend, Charlie. Thank you for a poem from your heart, tender and strong! Glad you had a best friend named Lynn 🙂

    • Thanks Lynn.. and truly looking back on it.. some of it is silly now.. with adult eyes.. but of course so confusing then.. and yes.. i always want to see my friend Lynn again.. and of course Charlie too in heaven as that may be the case.. somewHere now then.. now.. and last class reunion.. i am a shut-in with illnesses and cannot go.. but certainly i will go to the next one.. which will be the 40th class reunion in 2018.. God willing.. of course.. smiles.. and thanks my friend Lynn.. two or three.. or however many friendly Lynns.. i meet in life..:)

  9. Mary says:

    So sorry about what you went through! How very painful. Kids can be so mean for no good reason. Especially sad about your dog really…that is the most painful thing of all.

    • Yeah.. Mary.. truly.. compared to losing Charlie.. i didn’t care what those kids did to me.. as long as my dog was okay.. but truly the memory of Charlie is what also helped me to get back from real human hell of no emotions for those 66 months of that beyond any human hell i can imagine before.. so yeah.. Charlie’s death as dark as it was then.. is still a light of my life.. and sacrifice for that life of Charlie that continues in my eyes.. i don’t hold humans as any higher as Love as any other being.. they are ALL worthwhile as Nature IN 100% Love and Respect.. and my cats continue to teach me that lesson well..

      Yellow Boy has Feline Leukemia but Love makes an immune system as strong as it can be.. and as much as Yellow Boy is Loved that will be the medicine for him that no medicine from Vet can bring.. other than that same Love from Vets who are most often that Loving too.. with all animals as well..:)

  10. But oh no..!
    Teachers
    never
    escape
    School..
    smiles..
    Or Learners..:)

    Ah.. yes.. the church continues to
    serve the function of the village
    supplying school needs for
    life that parents often
    can no longer do
    without help..
    and perhaps
    the emotiOnal
    ways of heArt
    expressING as SpiRit
    as human balanced
    mind and body soUl
    are among the
    greaTest
    school
    tools
    Church
    can and
    WILL
    provide
    for all schools
    greatEST needs
    to be met ALL Now..:)

    Ah.. yes.. i can relate.. difficulty speaking
    coherently straight with no mumbling
    or stuttering to effectively
    communicate.. straight
    A’s are not enough when
    one fails the speaking
    parts in roles
    of School..
    and for
    me the
    writing no easier
    to come up with
    anything new..:)

    Oh when school becomes work instead of play
    the mechanical cognition can tick
    down to robot
    minds of
    dissolution
    of human being..
    but society will just
    not work without school..
    and we must tick off
    the bad parts.. and
    continue on renew
    as this land is our
    land together
    in well
    being
    and sickness
    a Like for aLL.. NOw..:)

    Nature’s school
    never opening
    never closing
    JUST
    i
    CE
    closed
    case..:)

    Truly sad the state does not allow
    school.. to teach lessons of
    humanity.. where ‘they’
    are no longer teaching
    those lessons at
    home.. and nah..
    not just a lower
    socio-economic
    thingy.. some
    times the
    highest
    classes
    are completely
    disconnected
    from humanity
    AS those AT
    highest
    levels
    determining
    curriculum
    of
    Human
    101..:)

    Ah.. that look of the very first day
    of entering school..
    walking the
    plank
    no
    ease..
    mate
    This is
    uncharted human
    land forged by insanity..;)

    Ah.. me.. not smart enough to feel what school is doing
    to me.. why Summer feels so much better
    than school.. year.. of what
    really counts in emotional..
    physical.. existential
    and in general
    Human 101
    Social
    Intelligence
    to move connect
    and create life once again..:)

    Ah.. yes.. a scholar.. a fighter..
    but most importantly
    a diplomat
    and
    negotiator
    at age 5..:)

    Ah.. yes.. a school of ADHD Hell.. where sitting still extends out all around
    the year now.. in some places.. where Physical Education is
    no longer even necessary in some high schools..
    and if one is lucky emotions
    are an art of human
    for basic
    survival
    still allowing
    that if that at all..:)

    Ah.. sitters and rovers of school.. alike in most all of
    animal kingdom.. in general as well..
    where school can and will
    be adventure
    and for others
    a challenge just to
    get through
    every now
    of self-conscious
    discomfort of
    one level or
    another
    in speed
    or slow..:)

    Oh.. new rules school.. crystalized intelligence.. rote memory
    of multiple choice facts.. figures.. but tHere is
    fluid intelligence moving.. connecting.. creating
    ART of human being IN ALL of Love
    that comes in Light
    and Truth of
    Human Being
    WELL..
    water
    of school
    is sewAge
    compared
    to ART
    fluidly
    flowing
    Creation
    Activities
    PARTiCles
    WAVES
    FiELD
    imagi
    NatiON
    DREAMS
    COME
    FRUiT
    i
    ON WitH
    I as actor
    of i and
    exclamatiOn
    POINT SPIRiT!
    expresSing
    iPLAY
    DIRECTORS
    WENOWALL!..:)!

    i have to say graduating close to
    the top of a class of almost
    four hundred in
    high school..
    that i learn
    nothing of
    value other
    than two
    of the three
    R’s of ‘Rithmetic
    and Reading and
    truly graduating
    like this with
    little to no
    ability
    to oRate
    or ‘rite
    coherently
    in creative thought
    in output.. and even
    after three degrees in
    college the same dismal
    report of school failing
    me my basic humanity
    of education as
    multiple
    choice is
    enough then..
    to pass me at
    the top
    of the
    class…
    THAT pArt of
    education is
    changing some..
    but the ART of
    Being Human
    is nowHere
    still in
    the curriculum
    of Westernized
    schools from
    moving.. connecting
    to creating human
    being Well NOW
    with more than
    Standard IQ
    intelligences
    that humans
    are not
    even evolving
    for more or
    less to begin
    with except
    for those cogs
    in the machine
    of walls of
    society making
    excess of comforts
    in materialism way
    possible as Zombies
    grow larger in numbers..:)

    Ah the beauty of the
    inner monster.. the class clown..
    the trickster.. the joker.. the sacred fool..
    the inner being that does say free in so many words
    of actions.. steps in human being that says wake
    up crowd
    and
    step outside
    the box
    of
    what you’re
    used to
    AS NEW
    path
    of
    Freedom’s
    Truth and Light..:)

    Ah.. heArt a lit one.. warmer
    yes.. in humid rivers flow..
    no snow in North Florida
    row.. but prison goes
    up the hill a little
    further in brick
    story school..
    to take
    River
    flow
    away
    eventually
    freezing heArt
    no longer wave
    oh.. ocean blue
    eyes i miss you
    at 47.. but i flow
    back to me at 55..
    no signs of speed
    limits for me..
    i flow
    i ride
    i play
    i pray
    rivers
    edge free
    to waves
    Ocean Blue
    in i’s of I! now..:)

    Joy
    eYes..
    romancing
    emotions
    moving connecting
    creating flowing waves
    ocean never ending..
    so below.. a spark..
    a light.. libido
    never
    ever
    oceans
    emotions
    wheels of
    Love
    always
    ending
    words
    below..
    above
    i LOVE
    below
    above
    i
    AM..:)

    Ah.. mothers pride of children
    like cubs of mother Lioness
    step high step low
    grow more
    as Love
    Flows..
    in out
    as tides
    of dark
    and Light..
    a mix makes
    birds buzz
    and bees fly..:)

    OH no.. and then
    there’s work
    and school
    starts again..
    and then
    theRe’s
    tires
    and
    re
    tiring
    life with
    full rubber
    on wheels of
    life again.. a
    Live we go
    in golden
    years
    if
    allowing
    flow of
    life
    once
    again..:)

    Lynn.. of course write on course
    it’s you again.. at the end
    of this dVerse trail..
    more and less..
    and i never fail
    to come again..
    hehe.. and yes..
    siblings alike
    and all
    homogenous
    cultures tend
    to get along
    more than
    different
    abodes
    but
    different
    rules now..
    challenge of
    eternity to
    establish
    rules
    of compassion
    and cooperation
    wheRe different rules..:)

    A sponge can hold much water..
    float forever
    on rivers
    that move..
    connect
    to oceans
    creating more..
    but a sponge
    that stills
    in one
    sink
    of
    dirty
    water
    grows
    old with
    mold before
    ever truly creating more
    absorbing ocean
    instead
    of just
    one behavioral
    sink.. and yeah..
    there’s even a
    link for
    THAT..
    smiles..
    “Behavioral
    Sink” on
    Google..
    ARE we
    rats or
    humans..
    jury
    hung
    still
    on THAT
    chances
    are both
    and
    lesson
    learning
    moving
    connecting
    creating
    away from
    sinks of US..:)

    This time Sister..LYNN it is
    hard to miss ya..
    as we almost
    tie at
    19 for
    me and
    20 for you..
    but i still
    beat you
    and expect
    you to beat
    me next time
    as that is fair
    enough
    for me..
    as tie
    as well..:)

    Ah yes.. the bell tolls for ending school..
    and even larger Universities
    where friendly eyes
    too scared..
    connections no
    longer growing..
    and oh NO WORK..
    where all’s a dollar
    so much easier
    when doing it
    with others
    free even
    with
    restricting
    school.. yes..
    as much as i hate
    school.. i miss the
    friends more than
    any restriction
    of school..
    and i
    feel i
    am far
    from the
    only one on that..
    as Facebook friends
    most often grow
    with High Schools
    past.. but nah..
    i much too
    weird
    for them..
    now..
    but my
    school now
    is the world instead..:)

    There is no schooling quite like the
    schooling that is nature
    abundant in
    freedom of
    curriculum of
    life.. adding in the
    ingredient of Unconditional
    Love.. and school becomes
    the child that still
    feeds upon breast
    of Love’s Milk..
    where emotions
    grow equally
    free with
    Intellect
    too..
    Village
    always
    raising
    child before..
    home schooling is
    the way of hundreds
    of thousands of years..
    where brick
    buildings
    and other
    mortified
    structures
    never
    rule..
    Free Education
    Freest with
    LOVE
    of Village
    home and
    Family’s Loving
    eYes.. allnowallone..:)

    Ah.. greaTest thirst for anything in my life has been
    the thirst for feeling.. granted exquisite ones
    from birth but losing them
    to knowledge ways
    of robotic
    mechanical
    cognition being..
    OH the LESSONS
    OF LIFE LEARNING
    well for me then..
    THAT less than
    70 standard IQ
    emotional savants
    are beyond measure
    of intelligence for
    ME
    Moving..
    Connecting
    and Creating..
    requiring DOING
    moreover
    thinking..
    lesson
    of many of
    my less than
    70 IQ
    teachers
    and mentors..
    And of course
    still major
    measure
    success in human
    creativity making
    children Loving
    children..
    at
    any age
    of being Well IN
    Humanity’s NOw..:)

    Child tiMe NOw reaLity
    alArm clocks thEn
    futURe illusiOn
    human
    kiNd
    NOW
    LiVes
    ChiLd
    eYes
    REAL
    Sch00l
    noWinOW..:)

    Oh.. my
    goodness.. the
    job of childhood speaks
    trembling into adulthood
    for me.. i always wonder
    when will i learn how to well
    learn speak.. after all.. my mother
    and father do it so fluently.. so well..
    ah.. but they never input like i do.. oh
    to output is more than input before.. smiles..
    and yes.. now i never ever.. no.. ever never shut UP..;)

  11. MarinaSofia says:

    Wow, this back to school prompt is bringing out some really dark memories and emotion! So sorry to hear about the pressure, the bullying and the loss of your only unconditional friend. Kids are so cruel at times.

    • Ah.. yes.. Marina Sofia.. in the Poet world and Artist World.. and even any World where there are achievers that break out of boxes there are often these stories of dark and bullying in childhood of those who use this darkness to inspire greater Artistic Light.. but then sadly there are the others.. the bullied who go on to extend the vicious cycle and become bullies more..

      BUT ART WINS OUT

      IN LOVE.. OF

      HUMAN

      EYeS..:)

  12. claudia says:

    oh heck – that breaks my heart – i had a dog when i was a teenager and he was such a close friend – and even when all other friends sucked
    thanks for sharing your story a bit – bullying sucks big time

    • Yeah.. bullying Sucks Claudia but as the following music video nicely illustrates in ‘Radioactive’ way there is a rising tide of opposition.. namely ART and LOVE that in TSunAmi Form IS washing away the residue of Darker ways of human beings.. some folks call it THE New Age.. THE Illuminati.. THE Real ONE about Truth and Light and not the fake one that folks twist Just like Jesus’ teaching to repress human nature and oppress others in domination through illusory fears of subjugation and oppression..

      Anyway.. pioneers from Jesus to most unlikely candidates like Aleister Crowley are predicting this phenomenon for Centuries and Years.. and surely when an African American becomes President of the United States.. and a Woman is about to enter those doors too.. those are sealing signs of a new age of Art IN Love’s Freedom.. in ALL the COLORS that comes in.. and perhaps when a Gay President comes that will be the Seventh Seal of the Kingdom Jesus is speaking of when Love your neighbor as yourself with complete tolerance and acceptance of human differences becomes more than a rule and just a talking point to muse..

      BUT the Dance of
      Life that comes in
      real flesh and
      blood human
      steps..

      But yeah.. then there is Donald Trump who truly stands as a symbol for what most of the folks of my Local First Baptist towering church IS.. when folks enter my River Town.. SEE standing HIGH and LOW at core.. a clique.. a group of human beings.. where they SAY THEY ARE GOD’s chosen.. few.. and the others can wait behind a wall of division.. of true Anti-Christ Mission.. exemplified Ironically so.. in almost ludicrous clarity.. for anyone who can see through all the selfish serving lies of individual or group.. with real Truth and Light of Jesus eYes of Human Nature and the God of Nature as well..

      BUT yes.. Tribal Instinct is pArt of GOD and Human Nature too.. and even this Anti-Christ Nature too.. and the solutions are any solutions that help to make the World ONE Tribe where all humans are tolerated.. accepted into THAT UNIVERSAL TRIBE.. and of course the first step of that is a Dance of MOVING.. CONNECTING.. AND CREATING.. SAME STUFF THAT TRIBES OF OLD USE TO ESTABLISH SHARING CONNECTIONS AMONG STRANGERS OF SEPARATE TRIBES..

      AND THE BACK BONE OF

      THAT NOW… IS

      INFORMATION TECHNOLOGY

      AND LINES OF COMMUNICATION

      THAT CONTINUE TO MOVE AND SPREAD
      AROUND THE WORLD.. WHERE PEOPLE
      FIND THAT YES.. WE ARE ALL ALIKE AT
      CORE.. SHARING.. LOVING.. HUMAN
      BEINGS WHEN SET FREE
      IN COMMONALITIES
      INSTEAD
      OF
      SEPARATING
      DIFFERENCES
      AND SURELY
      DANCE IS
      A UNIVERSAL
      LANGUAGE THAT
      WORKS FOR OUR ANCESTORS
      AND CAN WORK NOW.. IF THAT
      REVIVAL
      CONTINUES
      IN THE
      WORLD
      OF ART
      MY FRIEND..

      And SPORTS of ALL
      KIND are certainly
      part of that Tribal
      Dance of one that
      binds all together..
      particularly Soccer
      it seems as ALL
      WORK to
      MOVE THE
      BALL TOWARDS
      THE SAME
      GOAL..
      OF
      ONE
      NET
      OF LOVE..
      SOFTER AND
      MORE LOVING
      OF COURSE
      THAN
      AMERICAN
      STYLE
      FOOT
      BALL
      AND
      no wonder
      why.. truly..
      as WE continue
      to evolve OURONE
      FEAT OF LOVE..:)

  13. I can see this happening.. the bullying and the exclusions.. those aliens always picking on what’s different.. I think this happened to me as well, but fortunately there where other thing to focus my attentions on.. a few friends and our cat… and then came books.

    • Ah.. yes Bjorn.. so often the medicine for bullying is the Love of Togetherness and all ways of Moving Imagination and and Connections in Creation Activity that come to rescue us from Bullies of Life.. from Cats and Dogs to books and brushes of painting human life Renewing Love as Creativity..:)

  14. Sumana Roy says:

    bullying is such a crime and they are always in a gang…the cowards…

    • Ah yes.. so true Sumana Roy that human bullying is a crime and ‘they’ are most always in a Gang and Cowards in numbers.. and the saddest part perhaps of my bullying in the middle ages of school.. is that the one thing in common that almost ALL of the bullies have in numbers (:Ha! ‘they’ have no idea then.. they are dealing with a budding Anthropologist/Psychologist/Sociologist/Health IN ART Scientist.. eventuAlly degreeING in UNIversITy of West Florida as such;) IS the supporting ideology and human Arms of the giant First Baptist Church in my local area..

      And i without my ‘Robert Conrad’.. ‘Wild Wild West’ looking ‘James West’.. Law Enforcement officer (46 years in total terms of that) patriarchal influencing Father.. i am raised by Love dripping with the estrogen of an almost total female matriarchal influence from birth.. just seeing my father twice a year.. trying to quickly imitate that gender role.. BUT that doesn’t work.. obviously.. as i become soft as estrogen and matriarchy will Love..

      And I have no clue what this First Baptist Patriarchy thingy is that I must imitate to become one of the MALE crowd then.. and i become a very androgynous looking human at that time that is soft smiling and moving contradicting all the rules of the First Baptist patriarchy fueled by homophobia.. and hate of anything that moves outside the First Baptist BOX of exclusion..

      Sadly church is the core sin of bullying in my town.. then.. and sadly still.. just a few years ago.. the most prominent Local Radio so-called Christian Evangelist in my town is still promoting the ideology that ‘homosexual behavior’ is demon possessed with his so-called Christian Manager of the Radio Station suggesting that so-called Welfare MOTHERS SHOULD BE STERILIZED BY LAW AFTER THE FIRST CHILD IF THEY EXPECT TO STAY ON SO-CALLED WELFARE..

      I am spitting nails listening to THAT but far too weak then with illness to confront face to face.. but still as weak as i am behind a computer with barely a voice to speak.. I confront the Preacher and Radio Station Manager online.. and both truly never do that again.. on Radio Air.. as far as I know now.. WORDS are powerful sWORDS.. much more powerful than my feet that now press half a ton twenty five times.. and can hypothetically kick most ‘evil butt’.. one on one.. but nah.. I WiLL use Art of Words instead of feat of physical harm.. and on top of that I enjoy my freedom.. and do not want to go to jail.. smiles..:)

  15. Glenn Buttkus says:

    I was always big for my age, but on junior high I was bullied by a gang of tough kids. I made it a point to first report them to the teachers, & then each time I found one alone, I would beat them up. Off to the vice-principal’s office we’d go. I was sent back to class, the other kid got expelled. I repeated this several more times, & the bullying stopped.

    • Hi Glenn.. i still am amazed that i get away free from any beatings
      on me.. or any significant fear of that.. but oh the
      story different for friends as close as wife..
      as my pretty little wife poor with no church
      ‘rich’ friends behind her in school..
      is terrified every
      day in school
      that literally
      mean
      girls
      are gonna
      kill her dead..
      they still
      don’t
      like her
      for the same
      beautiful reasons..
      but nah.. she still thinks
      it is just ’cause she was poor..
      but that is no competition for
      the boys.. as mean girls
      continue to beat
      the nice
      and pretty
      ones down..
      If only ‘they’
      realize real
      beauty comes
      from
      within..
      and flourishes
      until death do
      us
      pArt..:)

  16. So much need to pay attention to the individual needs of kids and to continue to draw attention to the damage done to those who are bullied AND, I suppose, to those who bully (I was in the former group. It must be a challenge for teachers to blend individualized lesson plans with the needs of most kids. In a way it would be good to base “grades” on the level of learning but there are the emotional developmental concerns to be considered. Guess that’s why I like teaching adults and enjoyed learning much more as an adult. Round pegs just don’t fit into square holes…but I ramble.

    • Haha! Victoria obviously i ramble more.. as i am never
      one to fit in holes.. except
      for rabbit
      ones
      that never
      go
      one
      way only..
      i am a forked
      road with
      unlimited
      roads
      that go..
      and there is
      no individualized
      plan that works
      for me.. except
      me.. and truly
      these
      avenues
      of World
      connections
      provide more
      avenues for US
      who fit in no
      wholes
      round
      or square
      we are
      PI flowing
      in PHI
      way..
      with numbers
      never ending
      into Infinities
      Truth and LigHT..:)

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