This post is inspired
by
another
Mid-aged
diagnosed
person
on
the
Autism spectrum
who
doesn’t
call
himself
poet as his
poetic expression
comes from his heart
and does not match
the scientific
sonnets
and
such
of
Poetic FORM!
But
here’s
the
thing..
i follow the
Robin Williams
Dead Poet Society
RIP THE RULES OUT! OF THE
RULE BOOK WAY OF POE
TRY!
MATTER OF FACT!
I DON’T GIVE A F**
FUN!
WHAT
PEOPLE
CALL
WHAT
i
WRITE!
THE
WHOLE
DAM
THING!
COMES FROM HEART!
THERE
AIN’T
NO
THOUGHTS!
IN VERBAL WAY
BEFORE
THE
WORDS
HIT
THE
SCREEN
THEY
JUST
COME!
THROUGH!
MY
FINGERS!
WHEN
i’m
IN
heART
MODE!
AND
YES!
STILL!
WHEN i GO! to science
mode
my brain is steaming
like
a
locomotive
and
the
HEART
GETS
TURNED
OFF!
Well..
almost
off..;)
AND
VICE VERSA!
AND NO! THEY DON’T
PLAY TOGETHER
SO
WELL..
THEY
LIKE
TO
HAVE
THEIR
OWN
WAY!
But anyway
before i get to my response
THAT is part
science
and
part
Heart..
the word poetry
kinda
like
Jesus!
JUST!
AIN’T
what
IT
used
to
BE
BEfore
humans
BECOME
MORE LIKE
ROBOTS..
UGH
NOW
PLASTERED TO SCREENS
i
scream!
NO
LONGER!
EXPLORING
TRUE!
CORE!
INTELLIGENCE
OF
MOVING!
LIKE
THE
GOLDEN!
SPIRAL
MEAN!
OF
ALLITIS!
OH!
AND
TODAY
IS
MY
22ND WEEK
CONSECUTIVE
OF
RAVE DANCE NIGHT!
WITH
ALL
THE
COLLEGE AGE
ADULTS AT
OLE
SEVILLE
QUARTER
IN
PENSACOLA
FL!
HAVEN’T PICKED OUT A SHIRT YET!
MORE TO COME ON THAT!
IN
YES!
THIS
POST
IN
CELEBRATING
WITH
SUPER
FUN
DANCE
PHOTOS
SOMETIME
AFTER
3AM!
But for now i’ll just go with
my childhood
HALLOWEEN
DREAM!
OF
SUPERMAN!
NOW!
BEFORE
folks
tell
me
i
don’t
even
have
what
it
takes
to
exist!
TRUST!
ME!
DON’T
BELIEVE WHAT
ALL!
the
NAY SAYERS
SAY!
IN
LIFE!
YOU
TOO!
CAN
BE
A
TOTaLLY
NATURaLLY
MOTHER NATURE
TRUE!
BRED
SUPER
WO!
OR
MAN!
WrITE
NOW
2
!
But without BELIEVE!
ALL
IS
LOST
CAUSE!
FOR
TRUEST
HUWOMAN
POTENTIAL!
OF
FREE!
AND
NON-DOMESTICATED
WILD!
CHILD!
OF
GOD!
And
here’s the link..
this dude is kinda
fearless like me..
in
fact he gETs his dose
of enlightenment
sud
den
ly2!
A
whole
YEAR
BEFORE
ME!
NO
ANXIETY
FOR
HIM!
AS
FAR
AS
i
know
now!
i
DAM
SURE
DON’T
HAVE
ANY
SILLY
LITTLE
ILLUSORY
FEARS
ANY
MORE!
TRUE
FREEDOM!
FEARLESS
FRED
am
i
now!
YES!
i
am
FEARFREE!
WITH..
YAH..!
STILL
SOME!
CARE2;)!
AND
MORE
TO
COME!
AGAIN!
LATER
IN
DANCE
PHOTOS
AND
MAYBE
WORDS!
AND
EVEN
MORE
RESTRICTED
LINKS
DEPENDING
on..
if
i
HAVE!
the
‘SUPER POWERS’
TO
DO
THAT
(:LATER2!;)
http://neurodrooling.wordpress.com/2014/08/05/only-as-old-as-you-think/
Hmm..i missed this one..
yes i like it..
and i am completely convinced
that not only technology
but culture overall
is a source of functional disability
for modern humans..
But from my own experience..
documented ‘rather crudely’..
in real time..
http://myfreelancestripperblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/thomas-37-stripping.html
http://myfreelancestripperblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/lion-king-stripping.html
i do know that much of this is reversible..
even in older age
like us at 54..
if i remember correctly..
that you are the same age as me…
i savor the insights of all culture..
and the US culture
to put it bluntly..
su88s..
as far as cultivating innate human potential…
Whereas the way of the Tibetan Monk/YOGI..
although still somewhat restrictive..
as it too..
can be part of restrictive culture..
shows! what modern human potential..
still can be..!
As an example..
caught behind the stress of a desk for five years..
after an active job for over two decades..!
interacting with thousands of people..!
as opposed to
mostly a computer interface!
behind a desk..!
i move from around 28
on the AQ empathy/systemizing
‘Autism Quotient’ test..
to 36
at the end of the stay at that desk..
and then to 44 or 45
after being a shut-in for five years..
And then..
kinda like the Big Bang..!
the Kundalini rising..
Awakening..
Enlightenment experience
last Summer
like the one i ENJOY at 21..
moves me almost instantly!
way back to an 11 on the AQ ‘test’….
The key is..
maybe natural DMT..
not sure..
who knows..
maybe that’s what Kundalini rising even is..
a natural epigenetic sudden change
with natural access..
to
DMT
precipitated by
extreme!
biological/environmental/emotional stress..
but some people think i’m on Molly even now..
as i’m always floating on a cloud..
even in actual physical movement..
and connecting to everyone i see..
effortlessly!
with no dark preconceived notions
anymore
about the other ‘one’….
And now!
instead of being chilled in 100 degree temperatures
at the height of human exhaustion in 2007..
i can enjoy nature naked!
in 18 degree temperatures..
yes documented as such too..
‘crudely’ less…
Salient causal factor i see tHere..
is i move baby move..
in all directions..
in A TAI CHI way
innovated by me..
documented by way
of
Nike PLUS GPS Sports watch
over 2000 miles this year..
mostly in stores..
Big difference!
i’m not a marshmallow robot anymore..
i’m robust now..
neuroplasticity and epigenetics!
obviously applies both!
to the illusion of the separation
of the so called mind and body..
and what i mean by this..
is..
as my body becomes more! robust
so does my mind..
as my body becomes more balanced
and calm
so does my mind..
etc..
yes!
Eastern philosophy understands this
much better!
than the sitters of the western way..
with pills and such to cure every ill…
What i do know for sure!
is human instinct and intuition
is highly underrated!
in our western culture..
that becomes one more!
of mechanical cognition
rather that flesh and blood social cognition..
everyday..!
Text is limited..!
The eyes can say so many things..
that words will never relate alone..
And then there is the rest of non-verbal language..
clothed by culture too..
yes!
literally clothed..
where this greatest of all human communication device..
around
way!
before!
we develop complex abstract language..
is out of vogue..
haha..
Bull Sh88..!
one can’t fool mother nature TRUE..!
what i like to call GOD2…!
But yes..!
one can figure GOD out..
if one looks within..
aka..
as human instinct and intuition..
Basically the GOD we’re born with/as..
IS!
Not the one we are fed….
The true source of all enlightenment in my opinion..
from within…
Rituals..
meditation..
and all of THAT by lesson plan..
are the paths of others..
but only we can determine
the true path for us…
one at a time..
with ALLITIS as friend..
not foe…
The hard part is escaping
what we are fed…
For me the shut-in pain for five years..
is a blessing..!
beyond all ‘cultural beliefs’..!
but thank GOD it’s gone..!
hope the same for your reported ills as well..friend..:)
1088
words
write
NOW
!
Well..
escaping Plato’s
CAVE
AIN’T
EASY!
I’LL
TELL
YA
THAT!
WELL..
TRYING
TO
DESCRIBE
WHAT
IT’S
LIKE
OUT
HERE!
WELL..
IT’S
KINDA
LIKE
THE
MATRIX
MOVIE..
JUST
IMAGINE..
i’m
NEO
if
ya
can!
SAME Story!
Been
told
in
more
metaphors
of
huwoman
communication
AS
CAN
be
IMAGINED!
BUT
IT’S
REAL
YES!
WhERE
i’m
at
NOW!
IS
!REAL!BLISS!
IT
IS
NO!
ILLLUSION!
THE
ILLUSION
IS!
THE
CAVE!
THE
MATRIX!…2
A
LIGHT!
IS
ALWAYS!
AND
WILL!
ALWAYS!
BE
THE
!*!*!*1166word@!TRUTH!sWORD1166*!*!*!
Well..
if
i’m not mistaken
as
the
Virginia
Slims
spokesperson
says..
i’ve
come
a
long
way
baby!
particularly
with
restricted
link
2
!
REALITY
IS
STRANGER
THAN
FICTION!
NO
DOUBT!
@
LEAST
FOR
ME!
in
the TOTALITY
OF
MY
LIFE!
B ALL YA CAN B!
Y
NOT
NOW!
IF..i
HAVE
A
NICKEL
FOR
EVERY TIME
SOMEONE
MADE
FUN
OF
MY
WALKING
i’D
BE
RICHER
THAN
i
already
AM!
Now
they
clap..
high five me..
bump and grind me..
Change
is
good…..
for the most part!
AHH!
and
finAlly
on
the
22nd week
no
one
there
accuses me of taking
DRUGS
to
fuel
my
3
HOUR
MARATHON
DANCE!
WHO
WOULDA
THOUGHT
THE
KID
UP
THERE
WILL
BE
A WELL KNOWN
METRO
AREA
DANCER
BASED
ON
MERIT
AND
THAT
IS
1293word!ALL!word1293
http://myfreelancestripperblog.blogspot.com/2014/08/enlightened-stripping.html
KATiE MiA FredericK!iI 
i would agree that western culture has lost much of its connection
and religion becomes just another way to suppress thought///attitude and …
when the ritual becomes ritual for the sake of ritual
& has no bearing on the rest of our lives…
dont know that i could go totally with my intuition
because that often can lead me to not so good places…
and in a sense makes me god…which i know i am not
Yes..i agree and that is what the final shirt of the day for me..for the actual dance will be..one of yin and yang balance with the Tiger and Dragon of will guarding each side..to insure balance..
Reason and intuition must exist..but be used in balance not to the advantage of one or the other..but for me..with love it is mostly instinct and intuition..i have a hard time making love or poetry into a math equation..or dance and song..as same..they are all GOD to me..with reason being the scribe thereof..smiles..and again have a great rest of the day and night…Brian..:)
This gave me food for thought, as yours tend to do. I realized how very difficult it would have been to have struggled with an autistic spectrum disorder back a few decades ago. As a nurse, I don’t recall ever having been made aware of it and only in hindsight was I able to recognize it in one of my patients who we described as having a “very peculiar type of dementia.” She went undiagnosed. I also have come to recognize certain aspects of autism in my own life. Sad that it went unrecognized for so long. Of course, I will clarify I worked primarily with death and dying, ergo for the most part, older patients.
Autism is a fascinating subject to me as complex as human nature itself it seems..and perhaps a microcosm of much suffering in the world..as it relates to the imbalance of systemizing and empathizing ways..which is another metaphor for reason and intuition/instinct..social cognition and mechanical cognition..and in the broadest sense of Eastern philosophy Yang and Yin.. all metaphors in language for the dualistic nature of what it means to be human..
http://katiemiaaghogday.blogspot.com/2013/03/the-problem-of-determining-who-is.html
I put my scientist hat on..and did an exhaustive study on it..a year ago..and the issue really is…that studies now show..approximately 10 to 15 percent of the general population fall on the high potential autistic side of the systemizing part of the AQ test at 32..which as is..may constitute most of the symptoms other than the effect of those symptoms together causing considerable disability to function in a major area of life functioning on a day to day basis..
And yes..my wife with her social anxiety and OCD actually fits in at 32..although her doctor doesn’t consider her close to autism..in official diagnostic status….
i truly have spent most of my life as a sort of canary in the coal mine..and now escaping the coal mine..by learning how to adapt to it..is really a miracle for me now at age 54..and this blog truly is a healing and ongoing maintenance project to keep me in empathizing land..which means i have to over do the emotions part to stay there..
i love people..and the only reason i came to dVerse was in hopes of being able to find some kind of online real empathizing connection to better help to rebuild my humanity..and maintain it too…
My mind is extremely unusual..and people have a difficult time understanding my challenges as i look so healthy and happy on the outside..and truly i am at peace and total bliss now..but mostly it is because i have complete control over my life as financially independent..and am no longer in a position of adapt or do not survive the social environment..which for 47 years..until i had a complete failure of health..took 100 percent of my best effort every day…
i provide these pictures in hopes of helping people understand that yes i did fit the physical stereotype when i was young..and my sister pictured next to me..is diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome..in her late 40’s as well..
However as i was initially diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome it was changed to PDD NOS when the doctor learned i had a language delay until age 4..which in the US criteria..excludes one from the diagnosis..but not in the Gillberg Criteria that better reflects Hans Asperger’s case studies..that do include these type of Hyperlexic language delays..with high ability in pattern recognition and early reading..but often problems with comprehension..much of information is learned and recited by rote memory..where comprehension of movies and books to tell back the story to someone is highly limited…
Anyway.. my novel method of communication..reflects the way my brain truly works..
Strange yes..but therapeutic to me..and always nice when folks can understand some of it..and when they do..i do get the feeling they may also be somewhere on the broader autism spectrum phenotype..at times.. in that 10 to 15 percent range that i more likely fit into now than the more severe disabling part..since my lifestyle as is now..is one of comfort and satisfaction…
But put me back in as administrator over a department in the US Navy..going to to toe with Navy Captains..supervising 30 to 130 employees..and playing the role of higher department heads with hundreds of collateral duties..as a technical interface on a computer all day too..with financial management and all of that..
and i likely end up in the same..not so comfortable and satisfying place again…
i’m very fortunate the doctors do understand Autism well enough..to know the consequences now..of adapting in a place where there is no way out..but failure and yes..possibly death from total human exhaustion in tandem with years of chronic severe stress….
My biggest problem was..i felt like there was absolutely no room for mistakes..and mistakes meant death..as it was extremely hard to fit in socially accepted by other folks..but now i learn i must love myself as friend..and be my own father i never really had..and give myself lots of breaks..and actually learn to love imperfection..along with adventure..out of the box therapies..that insure the anxiety never comes back as well..yes this therapy actually used officially now..with PTSD patients..basically getting out there and doing something no one could expect you ever to do..
In my case..the dance walking in public..solo sober dancing in front of crowds of folks who must get drunk to get on the dance floor after i lead around an hour of dance..and the most adventurous part of all.. of course the middle aged male nude art..bizarre yes..but definitely liberating..to rid all the anxiety of not being comfortable with much of anything about myself for 53 long years…..
Never ever never give up..is definitely my slogan..and keep trying..until one finds what works..no matter what the herd thinks..of course along legal guidelines to stay out of any potential real trouble..:)
Thanks for stopping by.. you always make me feel totally accepted in the dVerse social group..:)
But yes.. i do understand i am very bizarre to many folks..and i do accept that too..i really have no choice..but to..:)if i want to have any chance of real human contact in life..
And yes this hope and insistence..to connect to people does carry on in real life..every hour of every day ..i live..
But there are much more dire challenges for folks going on everywhere..for sure..i feel very blessed for ALL MY BLESSINGS TO BE FREE AND HAPPY HUMAN BEING..OVERALL!..WITh AT LEAST some folks who will tolerate me..accept me..and at home at least try to love me..the best they know how…:)i hope..:)i BELIEVE! I have FAITH THIS IS ALWAYS TRUE TOO!IN ALL THINGS I do!
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