Prose expresses
touches emotions
PoeTry expresses
touches
un
ordin
ary..

Or one can follow the
Standard DicTionary
way of doing it.. but
nah
not
me..

Art IS creating
something NEW
IMHO
if it ain’t
THAT
ART
i ain’t
goin’
tHere..:)

42

Amen..

“it’s”

nature’s way manifest

in humans of saving grace..

And no doubt the core of

what is awakening in most so-called

holy folks escaping the insanity of

restricting culture on particularly

free spirited humans..

Who are more dopamine sensitive..

which of course is core to social abuse as a substantial

factor that even the director of the NIMH in the US suggests

is an epigenetic trigger for the genetic pre-disposition for

Schizophrenia and associated so-called psychosis..

as what is now described in

science as a type

of genetic virus..

And yes.. as often

is the case the medicine

that treats the symptoms can be

the REAL long term illness for those who

cannot cope naturally as many have through history

in accepting and supporting so-called

more primitive cultures..

where it is seen

as a vision quest

instead of disease

and or disorder..:)

Smiles.. I am fortunate..

I never need drugs

and at my age

at 55 my ‘experience’ in part..

better allows me profiency in Martial Arts..

Dance in general.. As well as Physical Strength..

leg pressing half a ton with ease.. Now 25 reps..

surpassing Marine ‘Jar Heads’ in their early twenties..

by double.. at my Military Gym.. with oh yeah..

YouTube proof for Internet evidence..

But alas only 14 reps..

5 months ago in that video..

But the key is the i

that is Truth and Light

behind I..

masters life as me..

all natural.. baby..

And I share that with the world

for those with similar eyes and ears to see and hear it..:)

I come across ‘this’ blog, in discussing the issue

of anti-psychotic drugs to treat schizophrenia and related

psychosis with a friend. Both my friend and I

are 55 year old males diagnosed

with Asperger’s Syndrome in middle age.

I find your most recent article to be reeking

of academic and common sense truth

of what it means

to be a human being.

Both of us (my friend and I) are very successful in

academics in earlier life with of course the

social challenges that go

along with a life spent

in mechanical cognition moreover

than social cognition activities

in flesh and blood life.

My short lived so-called psychotic break

comes in my early twenties as is common

after folks with extremely high measures

of standard IQ, reach around 14 or 15 years

of school and related social stresses that with

a School House of 2000 or so closely packed human

primates is an inevitable reality; particularly for those viewed

as way out of the norm, in terms of developing the most important human

evolving social animal intelligence of physical/emotional intelligence in

overall social cognition, in successful living and thriving as a social

animal who is ‘normal’ will naturally do with flesh and blood

practice, practice, practice; not unlike hawks who practice

flying who rarely fall out of the sky or monkeys who

swing from trees who rarely fall out of trees.

Practice is required in all stuff animal

to keep from falling down

as a general metaphor

of existence, too.

Well Yes, use

or lose it applies,

as in all stuff specifically human animal,

ranging from quadriceps to the emotional human heart

that connects with the emotional contagion of affective empathy

and learns cognitive empathy by days, months, years and decades

of real life trial and error human flesh and blood verbal and nonverbal

reciprocal social communication, in PRACTICE.

Spend a life winning academic rewards by using

mechanical cognition for a decade and a half, or so,

in this way of life of sitting still, prescribed by

human abstract written language, collective intelligence,

and complex cultures that house millions of folks in one city

as opposed to human being’s naturally evolving capacity

for connecting to 150 to 200 sets of other eyes

and what ‘we’ get is pure insanity for an extremely empathic

species of primate that is still evolving to innately, instinctually

and intuitively live in relatively small tribes to move invisibly

with mind and body balance in nature to escape predators

and capture prey; not unlike our other hairier cousins

of which the Bonobo is the closest and overall a much more,

in effect and AFFECT, loving and caring species than what human

beings manifest now in global cultures, overall.

Standard IQ, is more or less a

developing product

of 10 to 12 thousand years

of post agrarian culture.

Humanity’s IQ, as innately,

instinctually and intuitively gifted

by practicing flesh and blood life,

is as old as life itself.

The ability to succeed in

school, is a trap of cultures

attempting to make machines out of humans where

‘we’ walk with repressed and oppressed emotions on tight concrete

sidewalks that are most definitely required literally and as a metaphor

to control large populations of human beings that are simply

not evolving to live in groups of humans that large

without strict controls in repressing and

oppressing innate, instinctual and

intuitive human animal behavior.

The reason for my so-called psychotic break in the third

year of college is simple and common sense. I have a very difficult

time gaining social acceptance as a person with literally ‘retarded’ (slow)

social cognition; Having no idea then that physical and emotional intelligence

is the most important type of intelligence and most everything else I am

championing in school is to make me a productive cog in a

complex society to keep it working well enough to work;

with all the other cogs.

I finally get the heart brain horsepower

to get the social stuff figured out with all the straight A’s

to get accepted enough to meet that most important need

of human being for survival in acceptance by the tribe at

hand for the instinct that tells us this is a do or die

scenario for our overall survival as

a socially cooperative animal.

The Junior College I go to is

small and local, retaining a few of those

accepting social friendships of people who have gotten

use to my social/physical/emotional ‘retarded’ intelligence.

The bigger college is a new challenge where I have no old friendships

without the excellent tools of social cognition the other social

animals have practiced without the top of the class grades

I have on my resume, to effectively and affectively

make friends with a new group of social animals at school.

So yeah, I continue to practice my straight A’s and have

no idea how to make friends, become weaker in

social cognition skills, as yes, lose it or lose it continues to apply,

and eventually I become colder inside and more like a text book

than a human being, so one day a surge of social energy comes;

yeah probably epigenetic induced change in neuro-chemicals

and neuro-hormones to save my Grinch weak heart of emotions,

expressed emotions as spirit, and a soul that is then trapped in a head,

way out of the physical and emotional intelligence of emotional regulation

and sensory integration that makes mind and body balance a reality

in flesh and blood life.

My human innate, instinct,

and intuition of life as old as it exists as life itself,

finally overrides 12 thousand years of travel away from

what we even are as humanity or as social animal in general.

That part of me says F culture; go to the beach; escape this S, before it kills you.

So yeah, the part of me that is beyond this ego construct of what cultures

say I must think and do for survival FEELS ME ahead to escape.

So then, at age 21, I just start walking the beach;

my footprints grow longer,

until there is no more

human culture

in view of

humans or condos

behind me; and that

nature as has always, lives

in me, arises again; and I am reborn

as human again; hoping and grasping a straw

to survive as what I feel is me but cannot put into

human words, adequately then.

I honestly feel like I am GOD;

but no; NOT THAT CRAP IN

SUNDAY SCHOOL

about some dude

that is an only son

of GOD. I feel like I am a

part of everything and

not a separate COG in a machine.

And honestly, as a Gillberg Criteria

type Asperger’s person

with an Hyperlexic language delay until age four

that my Psychiatrist takes note of and eventually

part of why he bumps me into

the U.S. diagnostic criteria

PDDNOS part of the Autism Spectrum then;

when I am age three I look across the river front

where i live then; and feel this Universal Nature of GOD

inside me, outside me, above so below, and all around me.

I feel I have been here with no beginning and no end;

as yeah, well, after all, with my ‘Big Bang’ brain now,

if that is the case for an origin of all that is;

there can be no break in the chain

of events from beginning to now

that results in my existence now;

so yeah, everything I need to feel about

GOD for 100% faith in GOD, I feel then,

and now, without any words, church or school at all.

And yeah, attempting to relate this to psychiatrists

after I spend a somewhat manic three days

pondering all of this in my escape away

from insane culture, is a big mistake,

as that is a textbook definition of psychosis

when folks find out they are part of GOD

and the same who attempt to tell someone

about it in the psychiatric profession,

when they have a big smile on their face

and bliss of peace coming to this innate,

instinctual, and and intuitive awakening

and enlightenment in life;

that is no big deal in Eastern

Philosophies and will be rated

as totally normal over there.

But no, not in a culture where humans

are viewed as textbooks instead of real flesh

and blood feeling beings, with a whole

history of insane culture and

social stresses and abuse

as dark wind behind their back.

All of they can see of me, then,

is deluded psychotic words that I am

part of this whole dam thing of all that is that is GOD.

And so yeah, then they try to force drugs on me;

and eventually a community leader

who can vouch for who I am

before this break into common

sense, gets me out of a place of

drugs that quickly makes me

into a Zombie who cannot function at all.

I am just a few days away from getting sent to a State Asylum

before that; and instead do escape drug free,

eventually receive three college degrees,

go on to a successful 25 year career

with government service

with all my Autism Spectrum challenges in tow.

And then I am continue to get moved up the Peter Principle ladder

of success, until one day my newly found social abilities no longer

are great enough to meet social demands to fill the bill of reciprocal social

communication efficiency at work, and that severe and chronic fight

or flight stress eventually leads to 19 medical disorders,

including the worst pain known to mankind,

type two Trigeminal Neuralgia during

all waking hours for close to 66 months,

where the pain is actually assessed as

literally worse than crucifixion in medical literature

for that disorder, and in my case this dentist drill like

face pain with no novocaine is in my right eye

and ear making effective use of hearing and seeing

almost impossible with pain.

And yes, other stress exacerbated issues include Dysautonomia,

Sjogren’s Syndrome, Fibromyalgia, Severe Degenerative

Arthritis and Stenosis in my Spine,

PTSD, Severe Depression,

Anhedonia, Severe Anxiety; all intertwined with the

experience of years of chronic human stress,

and more specifically SOCIAL STRESS.

And YES, modern science now

illustrates well that Chronic Stress

over years will destroy all major body systems

and can lead to a premature death.

Anyway, the good news is

I am healthy, stronger,

and happier, and more productive

than ever before, in what I do now in

creative, artistic, social cognition activities of life;

including an approaching four thousand miles

in dance walk everywhere I go in public now,

with my wife who loves to shop,

over the span of two years of

recovery from 66 months

of shut-in illness stuck in a bedroom, more or less.

The point is I am human now, living in an

Insane Asylum of all of culture,

as it currently exists in the deep

Red State south; but hell no;

no longer trapped, as for all practical

intents and purposes I am NEO, Buddha,

Jesus, Lao TZU, or any other indigenous human being

that never falls into or escapes this Insane Asylum

served up as culture on a platter from birth.

The only thing that truly saves my human heart,

spirit and soul, is incredible illness that no

doctors can do anything for with any kind

of drug for pain, allowing me

and giving me no choice but

to escape modern westernized culture.

As with all other animals, I innately, instinctually

and intuitively find the cure through mind and body balance.

And I am here to ‘tale’ you now in words of Light and Truth;

that i ain’t insane baby; and modern westernized culture,

overall, is, truly Insane living mostly, in the

DARK OF DEATH in Life; wittingly or not.

And seriously, with half the nation on some

kind of pain killer in the U.S., about a third

of school age children assessed as type two pre-diabetic,

and sky rocketing prescriptions of psychotropic drugs

to fix a human who is living dead in life,

with incredible somatic pains

and emotional numbness

as a result of repressing

and having their human emotions

oppressed by others; emotions becoming

those somatic pains; why should anyone

doubt this; but never the less they do.

‘They’ live in a real matrix, and perhaps

one day they too, will save their selves

in terms of all natural human heart,

expressing that heart, as WELL

in a balanced mind and body

soul with emotional regulation,

sensory integration;

and much better cognitive

executive functioning in focus and short

term memory working like a finely

tuned Human Ferrari as flesh and blood FEELING AGAIN.

Anyway, answers to life are in disappearing human footprints

on sands of all natural beach life.

And no, I am no one special;

most everyone else who has

brought this message

to the rest of the tribe

has either been described as

insane or a mythological man or woman GOD.

So I relate it in every poetic way I can; and in all the

multi-media ways that modern technology

assists in as greatest artistic

creative view of what human being can do.

And every once in a while, i lay it all out like this,

in more or less logical terms; when no one is really

listening but folks like you,

who seem to have a

little more insight

than the average COG

in the machine of textbooks and school.

This is truly a beautiful life for those who finally

‘hear’ it, ‘see’ it and most importantly FEEL IT.

So sad that some human beings truly

never even live, and are worried

about what happens after they die.

And we call ourselves the apex predator;

Apex Blind Apes is closer to the truth.

A run of the mill Bonobo understands and most

importably FEELLS life in moving connecting

and creating better than most CEO’s

and Leaders of so-called

free nations.

Perhaps Obama

is an exception; am still studying him; Smiles.

And don’t worry, this is just a quick and wordy

visit, I will not come in the future to drown

your blog with words like this in the future.

As Part of my Autism Spectrum Hyperlexic form of Gillberg

Criteria Asperger’s syndrome, I read 10 to 15 times faster

than the average human being and as a life long

pianist with horrible dysgraphic handwriting,

I have the fortune of typing around

130 words a minutes,

when properly focused; so this is just a sigh for me.

Extremely High IQ can be a gift or curse.

I keep the gift and spit out the curse.

Smiles, and have a nice day friend. I come here innately, instinctually and intuitively, and I shut the door here now, in a continuing Heart expressing Spirit of Unconditional Tough and Passionate Love as Human Soul, with mind and body balance in harmony and FEELING CONNECTION with the rest of Nature AKA GOD.

It is what people like me through history have always done,

walking through villages, towns, and cities,

clothed in hidden and expressive eyes of

GOD OF ALL THAT IS..:)

AND YEAH, AGAIN I am ‘smart’ enough to feel that GOD exists with 100% faith as God is me and GOD is YOU AND GOD IS us; SOME folks think they know it; some folks think they don’t know it; and there is feeling it 100%, with no doubts at all.

Imagine life with zero illusory fears and zero illusory anxiety; able to do amazing things that none of your peers can do. I evidence that my friend and share this heaven of now with the world, online.

The philosophers of old are the real wise men as well as the philosophers of new with the same basic human Universal ALL Natural experience of living in balance with the rest of Nature as evolving now AKA God..:)

Anyway, your blog here helps inspire these words of analysis my friend, and I thank you for that as a lifelong friend, whether or not I ever see your face or speak to you again; as that is just the natural evolving human WAY OF BEING now, when no longer separate from the the rest of THAT..:)

A Seven year and seven month relationship

in professional practice of mental health.. yes..

my Psychiatrist and I.. Henry he.. Fred me..

a long journey from the beginning..

well before I am actually diagnosed with

the worst pain known to mankind…

literally worse than actual crucifixion

as described in medical literature..

named type two Trigeminal Neuralgia..

like a dentist drill in face without any

novocaine for pain relief and in my case

not the teeth but the right eye and ear..

making effective use of

my eyes and ears almost

impossible with

almost intolerable pain..

and yeah.. that’s why they call it

the suicide disease..

and additionally for me..

a total synergy of 19 medical disorders..

additionally ranging form Dysautonomia..

where my blood pressure and heart rate

will no longer synch properly under control of

autonomic nervous system.. to Sjogren’s Syndrome

where my eyes quit making tears..

making reality a nightmare like swimming

in salt water with eyes wide open..

as well as Spinal Stenosis and

accompanying Severe Degenerative Arthritis..

precipitated by a congenitally fused vertebra in my neck…

as well as congenitally closed up sinuses associated with

the Trigeminal Neuralgia.. where the ENT who does

the CAT SCAN asks how do you breathe…

and at the time I’m THINKING duh..

through my mouth..

what do you think..

mostly.. after all..

i am born this way baby..

through no fault of my own.. or anyone else..

as stuff happens in life.. and then there is PTSD..

Severe Depression.. Anxiety and accompanying Anhedonia..

as well as associated Alexithymia.. and other substantial challenges that round

out the 19 I am diagnosed with then.. well.. except for the fact it takes

almost two years to get diagnosed with Trigeminal Neuralgia..

as type two that lasts during all waking hours is so rare..

where most people wanna end it all just

experiencing the pain a few times a month..

if that much.. yes.. it’s worse than any migraine

headache imaginable.. in fact a migraine headache is

relief for the pain I experienced for 66 months..

but nah.. there is not a drop of water of relief

in human hell… so yeah..

why am I always happy

living life to the max..

I know what it feels like to die in life..

and I’m sorry if you are my friend and you have to hear this again..

but here’s the thing.. 1.2 million folks have viewed my stuff just

on my Google avenues of communicating the art of what I do..

and all those years.. i can never find anyone.. anywhere..

in the entire world offline or online who is even

diagnosed with type two chronic all

waking hours Trigeminal Neuralgia..

and i will be a cold hearted dude..

if I do not do my best to reach out..

in the rare possibility that

someone might read this some

time they stumble across my stuff

on an Internet search and it might give them just enough hope

in possible recovery.. seeing someone else recovered..

where they decide not to commit suicide

and try to live just another now..

for the real potential that

almost anything is possible

in this human life.. when folks

tell you the impossible will

never ever happen.. and

my psychiatrist.. suggests stuff I know

will not work before the root cause of the pain is

diagnosed two years into our patient.. doctor relationship..

but he allows me to use my best judgement on

what will be good for me.. and eventually

GOD provides the all innate..

instinctual.. and intuitive cures..

that now continue to follow..

in outstanding health and

happiness.. beyond my wildest

expectations and imagination before..

i hold no bars against what is possible in life..

and I WILL CONTINUE to pursue the greaTest of human potential for me in this lifetime.. no matter how different that my be from the practice in life of others.. and if folks do not like the way I count my blessings.. of course they are not required to look.. smiles.. but I love this life.. cherish it.. and truly worship the GOD of Nature inside us.. outside us.. above so below.. and all around us.. all the time now.. giving respect where

respect is due for ALLTHATIS AKA GOD..

AND ALL GOD’S CREATION AND CHILDREN..

INCLUDING HUMANS DARK AND LIGHT..

IN HEART.. SPIRIT.. SOUL..

AND WHATEVER

ELSE MAKES THE ENTIRE HUMAN AND

REST OF NATURE SOUP WHAT IT IS NOW..:)!

And here is what a finely tuned healthy Fred looks like..

and truly when I say

LET’S GET WEIRD i mean that..

as no one can beat me now..

as far as i know.. on the weird factor of surviving life

against impossible odds.. and i do more than survive..

i THRIVE ALIVE.. AS WEIRD AS HELL..

IN REAL LITERAL HUMAN HEAVEN NOW..

AND HEAVEN YES.. I PROVE IT EVERYWHERE I GO..

to the joy of some.. and the chagrin of others.. and that’s the way life goes.. in ups and downs.. but I master those ups and downs.. with much greater.. physical and emotional intelligence of emotional regulation.. sensory integration.. greater cognitive executive functioning through enhanced focus and short term working memory AKA my practice of a free style balancing act of martial arts and ballet like dance walk everywhere i go.. getting close to 4000 miles.. as will happen now in the 24th month after the start of this human dance journey.. in a week or so from now..:)

And yeah.. a post about the state of mental health in the U.S. as truly an expert in the field myself.. at this point in life.. in fact.. my Psychiatrist Henry who is quitting his practice in Crestview is moving to Orlando to teach and he tells me today that my own personal cure of dancing in leverage and balance to make my way to well being.. is inspiring enough to him.. where he is going to incorporate TAI CHI Movement Therapy into his mental health field of teaching.. so yeah.. at least folks in the know are listening to my story.. and I guess that makes it all worth it to tell it over and over.. as yeah.. it cured me.. so why not others.. and most people view me as so deliriously happy.. i can’t be sane.. but yes.. oh yes.. I am the sane one now.. and my psychiatrist

totally agrees with THAT.. IN professional analysis..

no matter what the folks who are not in the know AND

FEEL think they FEEL and know about living

life the best it can be as a free and wild human

being ferAlly civilized again!..:)

Yeah.. I am passionate about THIS.. AND TRUST ME

if you walk in my shoes just one second then..

I’m sure you will understand it much better too..

smiles.. and I truly hope no one..

YES no ONE ever has to

walk in real life hell shoes

like that.. and I will

do ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING TO

PREVENT THAT.. in my GREATest human potential

to my last GRASP FOR BREATH.. FOR LIVING

AND THRIVING THIS LIFE ALIVE..

AND NEVER EVER DEAD IN LIFE AGAIN!..:)

Oh and finally after my expression of creativity is reduced and reduced on the Wrong Planet and finally banned.. i find it amusing that the more ‘high classed’ folks on the Poetry site I frequent online ask me politely to conform to their ideas of what modern poetry should be and I politely tell them no I will create as I like.. and then they continue to impose guidelines on restrictions now on what will or will not be deleted that is shared there.. tailored to the multi-media poetry I do.. to restrict it further.. but what they do not understand is the gifted child in school gets bored and wants to do more..

I can write a poem that meets their requirement every five minutes.. without thinking at all.. linked with one paltry photo.. and sure I will do that in addition to this.. and just use their poetry for inspiration to write more.. and if they all decide to ban me.. from posting.. to their individual poetry sites.. which is the worst they can do to me.. I will read and get inspired and write it to my own blog without sharing it there if they individually decide to do that.. by deleting my posts or whatever..

but anyway.. the person who starts the whole

dam thing is my supporter and understands

that new art is most always discouraged

that breaks a mold of old.. and yeah.. the history

of that is ripe with discouragement all over the place in the art world..

and on top of that.. i publish for free online.. and do it all for the ZEN bliss of doing the art itself.. there is nothing they can take away from me.. as they continue to discourage others from pursuing their dreams of creativity.. by limiting it further and further.. SOME humans love to make other humans conform to their ideas of what is order in life..

But nah.. i for one.. am NOT afraid of ANY one’s freedom of expression from the so-called finest arts.. to what folks describe as the dirt of human pornography that is just another gift of ART from GOD that humans rule as evil.. while GOD Googles a Giggle AT their subjugating controlling butts.. in metaphor and reality too.. as we are all eyes of GOD who can see through the lies of human when

we seek the GOD answers all FREELY available

within HUMANS AS WE FIND THAT TRUTH

AND LIGHT FOR US DIRECTLY FROM GOD

WITH NO CULTURAL/RELIGIOUS INTERVENTION..:)

http://freeversenudepoetry.blogspot.com/2015/08/hurricane-art-am-i.html

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